A message from BN informing me that he don't know what I am thinking and what I want.
Informed him that I just want to move on and we both should all move on... Cause there is nothing that can be done anymore between us. I can't trust BN anymore and BN isn't willing to take the effort to make me trust him anymore. So we are at a stale mate...~
After a while, when we typed a lot, I got lazy and decided to give BN a call cause I really ant to settle it once and for all rather than clinging on this issue any longer.
I called and called but BN wouldn't picked up the phone until about 13 times, BN gave in and picked up the phone.
I asked what BN want in our relationship if we were to try and patch things up. But in the end, BN and I have different views... He sees plu friends as friends and don't mind making new friends. But for me, I prefer if my lover can shy away from other plu (as in not purposely finding a plu using any social apps)
My request is more to, we keep our current plu friends, if so happens that we have to deal with plu due to our job, I don't mind. But make sure it is just purely work related. If that guy so happen ask you out for movie and all, I will mind unless it is a group of people (like your colleagues together with him) but one to one, I am not comfortable.
For BN, he is more with all those going out with friends alone or not, plu or not. BN just say that if I am worry BN might fall for others, it will eventually happen, don't care if he sees one person or 10 persons. When it will happen, it will... For me, I prefer to prevent than having a higher chance it will occur.. So far, as I know all plu... is there any plu who really wants to be friend without benefit... I don't really know... Definitely there are but really not many... Especially those in social apps... BN also able to tell me that social apps people are mischievous... and yet he don't mind finding them for friends... It is just ironic for me.
So in the end, both of us have different wants and perspective of how we see plu and how should we treat other plu around us... So there is no wrong, no right, its just we see things differently... So its the end then... I told BN that, it is decided that it wouldn't be possible to patch up between us and it is confirmed..~
So, that time we both agreed that nothing can be done anything. And we hung up...
After that, continuously received message from BN, and got one message that BN still loves me...
Well...I don't think I can take it anymore... All I can tell BN is, If BN really love me, just let me go... And let me be happy... He still have many chances in life, knowing people, meeting people and getting to know more people..
So officially now, really letting BN go...~
But I also hope BN could have a happier life with a better person. I can say, I am not good enough.. There are good things I can give in life... But there are things I couldn't do too...~ So I am not perfect...~
All I can do now is to forget the existence of BN... I really don't want to have any memory of BN because at any time I will still remember about our past together. After all BN is one of the many ex that have a lot of impact in my life even though it is only for one year..~
Good luck BN... I really wish you all the best...~
If you like someone, let it go. If he comes back, he is your. If he doesn't, then it never was yours at all.
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